No effort (or connection) is wasted
We're each a collection of weirdnesses we've accumulated throughout our lives. Embrace it.
A couple weeks ago I listened to the new "Humans" podcast from Hank Green, and a line from that stuck out to me. Wyna Liu, editor of the NYT Connections game, said this:
I sort of believe that... the number of hours you spend doing something or thinking about something, ... that no effort's wasted. I like being interested in things, and learning how to make stuff... I think if it's something you really enjoy, it'll come out somewhere, you know?
That line resonated with the host (enough that he made a whole separate video about it), and it resonated with me, too. I often worry about the ways that I spend my time, and certainly not all of them are going to "come out somewhere." But I do think that life is very complex, and each person is very complex, and that complexity manifests.
In his video, Hank makes the comparison of each person as a junk drawer. Our lives are full of little things, experiences, weirdnesses, hidden talents, random tidbits of knowledge. Those things shape who we are, what we do, how we respond in lots of ways, some subtle, and some not.
For example, for a while I spent what I'm definitely sure is too much time browsing Reddit. But that random browsing helped me understand and relate to my classes better than I would have otherwise. Does that make it a valuable use of my time? Definitely not. But it was part of who I was, and is part of who I am now. It's neither good nor bad, it just is.
I think of this same concept when I talk to students about professional networking: each person has a random collection of connections they've made in various ways throughout their lives. Some of your connections may end up being helpful to you. Some may be people you can help. Others will just be. And you can never know which of the connections you make will be the person who makes a difference in your life, so you have to be open to a lot of connections. Thinking of each connection right off the bat in terms of its potential value is a great way to miss the one that might end up mattering most.
Of course we don't all have infinite time, nor infinite capacity to make and keep connections. We can be mindful about both without being caught up in a trap thinking of every single thing in terms of its immediate value to us.
